ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
