Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Randomize
