Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
