He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
