Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize