I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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