i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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