my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
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