Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Randomize
