I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
