i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize
