All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Randomize
