Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
