we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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