gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
