Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
