Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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