I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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