the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Hippo gnu deer
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize