part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
