and you said cock pushups were impossible
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
