I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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