Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
