See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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