I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize