i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
worst night to have a conscience
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Randomize
