Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
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