youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize