What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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