think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
