I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Randomize
