Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize