I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Randomize
