i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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