well you can't waste a boner
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Can I color on your dick again?
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
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