What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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