OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
