Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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