You're so nebulous sometimes
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize
