so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Randomize
