You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
