It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
