Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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