ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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