OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
