what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
