I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize