i would punch a child for taco bell
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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