her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Randomize
