it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize