have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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