She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
